Getting into the Christmas Spirit
Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 10:53 pm
Christmas was a fun time of year. Usually. Just not when you were stuck at college over the holidays. Last year had been different, they had all been in the dorm where it was just one great big party. Plenty of partying, plenty of booze, not much studying, and one huge hangover come January.
But that had been when they had all been first year students living in the dorm. Now they were five serious students, renting a house together (after being matched by the unfathomable computer at student-housing department). This year they were all serious second year students, not stupid freshmen. They all now knew that Christmas break was for studying, not partying. Only one of their number had gone home for Christmas, and (unfortunately) that girl wasn't Beverly Faber.
Beverly was a drama arts major. The other four girls wondered how she stayed in school; she was bubbly and cheerful, but her four roommates agreed that she was an airhead. Pretty (if a bit top heavy), the buxom blonde contained enough Christmas cheer for the entire household. Beverly insisted on getting a tree, one she decorated with popcorn strings and cheap ornaments. Beverly decked out the house with holly and the odd sprig of mistletoe (which were sometimes ripped down after a visiting boyfriend kissed the wrong girl). If it was anyone other than Beverly it would have a case of bullying, but Beverly was too good natured to be accused of bullying. She just kept insisting that everyone get in the Christmas mood and went so Christmasy that the others had no choice but to follow along or be accused of being a gloomy gus. Anytime they balked Beverly just said "Come on, it's tradition" and if they didn't go along then her lip would waver and tears would threaten and no one really wanted to make the girl cry over some stupid little Christmas thing.
Michelle Stamos was the only one who escaped Beverly's seasonal tyranny; she was the girl who had gone home for Christmas. Not that she escaped the Christmas mood. Her emails back included countless pictures of her siblings and cousins, all sickly sweet and filled with the Christmas spirit (and cookies, chocolates, and Christmas candies). Between Beverly's countless repetitions of "but it's Christmas" and Michelle's emails from home, the only one guilty of grinch-like behaviour was Elizabeth Tanners, the house nerd. She had a term paper due on December 24 and no amount of trying (or pleading) would get her away from her computer.
Things reached a fevered pitch on Christmas Eve.
"Come on, it's a Christmas tradition." Beverly urged. "It's Christmas Eve. We have to get into the Christmas mood."
"We put up the decorations." Kimberly Gladstone protested.
"And the holly." Rebecca Loughlin said.
"And the mistletoe isn't going back up over that doorway." Candace Olsen added.
"Just because Michelle's boyfriend kissed you..." Beverly countered.
"Kissed and GOOSED." Candace protested. "Mistletoe might let someone steal a kiss but there's no reason for someone's else's boyfriend's hand to be on my bum. Not unless he's nicer than Steve is and even then he's got to be much cuter than Steve. I can't see what Michelle sees in him, especially after he used mistletoe as an excuse to feel me up."
"But who cares about Steve?" Beverly protested. "It's Christmas Eve. We need to get into the Christmas spirit. Otherwise how will Santa know we're here?"
Kimberly, Rebecca, and Candace exchanged looks. All were secretly envying Elizabeth, who was locked in her room slaving over a paper and not stuck down here with a roommate who might, just might, still believe in Santa Claus.
At her age.
"Come on! It's tradition! We have to get into the Christmas spirit." Beverly insisted.
"Um, well, what do we have to do?" Candace asked dubiously.
"First, we need to make the Christmas punch." Beverly giggled. "I'll do that. Then we all change into our nightclothes. Nightgowns or PJs. We always change early on Christmas Eve and don't came back until afternoon on Christmas. It's part of my tradition!"
"I usually sleep in the nude." Rebecca reminded Beverly.
"So I can lend you something." Beverly said generously. "Come on, it's Christmas."
The three of them exchanged looks.
"Well come on! Otherwise Santa might not find us."
Beverly went off to the kitchen while the three of exchanged looks again.
"Do we have to change?" Rebecca asked.
"Do you want to try to tell Beverly that there's no such thing as Santa Claus." Kimberly asked.
"But she has to know." Candace protested. "She's not ten! She's in her second year at college. She has to know."
"This Beverly we're talking about." Kimberly reminded them. "Empty headed Beverly. I wouldn't be surprised if she believes the stork brings babies. Or that babies are found in the cabbage patch. Or that kissing in a bikini can get you pregnant. Are you really sure that she knows the truth about Santa? Really sure? And do you want to be the one to tell her if she does believe?"
They kept exchanging looks, hoping that someone would volunteer for that most awful of duties. No one did. None of them wanted to see a hurt look on Beverly's face.
"Okay, can someone lend me something to wear?" Rebecca asked, capitulating. "There's no way I can fit my B's in something designed for her D's. I'd be swimming in any of her tops."
"Sure, I've got something you can wear." Candace offered.
"Same here." Kimberly offered. "And if you can always raid Michelle's closet. Just as long as you wash before she gets back."
As they headed back upstairs, Candace called: "Elizabeth, Beverly is making us change for Christmas and..."
"Go away!" Elizabeth called through her locked door. "I'm almost done."
"But..."
"I'm working on my conclusion! I can't talk! If I talk I might forget what I need to write."
"But..."
"Go away! Stop talking to me!" Elizabeth shrieked. "I can't lose track of anything. Fractal equations don't write themselves. God! I almost used gamma when I meant beta! Sigma beta, not sigma gamma! Just leave me alone! I'll talk to you tomorrow."
"But we're all changing into PJs so if you do come down wear yours." Candace called. "Even Rebecca is wearing them."
"Fine! I'll change! Now go away! I need to get this done!!!"
Twenty minutes later, the three girls gathered downstairs in the living room they shared. There was a Christmas special on the TV, punch on the coffee table, and good smells drifting in from the kitchen. It was almost enough to make them remember Christmases past when they were young and still believed in Christmas miracles.
"Where did she get a punchbowl?" Candace asked.
"She must have brought it from home, I guess." Kimberly guessed. "Maybe she had in her room."
"Or maybe she bought it because she's ODing on Christmas." Rebecca suggested.
"You changed!" Beverly squealed, coming out of the kitchen with a tray of Christmas cookies, still hot from the oven. "Oh that's wonderful. Everyone's getting into the Christmas spirit! This is so wonderful. Help yourself to some punch."
"Um, sure." Rebecca said, helping herself to a glass. "Hey, this is good. What's in it?"
"Just some sprite, some pineapple juice, a bottle of cherries, ice cubes, and vodka." Beverly answered.
"Vodka?" Rebecca asked. "But you don't drink much."
"Well normally I don't, but it's Christmas." Beverly reminded them. "And since there's no kids around I only made the adult punch, not the kid's punch."
"What's in the kid's punch?" Candace asked, helping herself to glass.
"Sprite, some pineapple juice, a bottle of cherries, ice cubes, and no vodka." Beverly revealed. "That's always a lot fun at Christmas, watching the kids trying to sneak drinks from the adult bowl. Everyone knows they do it and half the time there's a bunch of drunk teens trying to act sober when even the little kids can see they're drunk."
"That's part of your Christmas tradition too?" Candace asked, sipping her drink.
"Of course it is." Beverly told her. "Now we eat cookies and chocolates and drink punch and wait for Santa."
Three girls exchanged looks, then started to hit the punch. They didn't know how much vodka was in but hoped it would be enough to take the edge off when Santa didn't come.
Rebecca couldn't help glancing at what the other girls were wearing. Beverly was in a set of babydolls, causing Rebecca to wonder if the girl would be wearing something like that home in front of male relatives. It was different when they were relatives but Rebecca thought she'd rather have a boy see her nude than when wearing that enticing outfit. As Beverly dashed here and there, making sure that everything was perfect, Rebecca couldn't help noticing how Beverly was bouncing around in her top.
'But knowing Beverly, she would wear that outfit in front of boy cousins and not know why they had hold a blanket or something over their laps.' Rebecca thought.
Kimberly's outfit was more sensible; a two piece flannel PJs set. They were the sort of thing that you could almost wear out in public. Candace had a nightgown on, but it went to her knees and was in no way as enticing or daring as Beverly babydolls. As for herself, Rebecca had changed into an oversized T-shirt and was wearing a bra and panties under it, and almost feeling overdressed. It wasn't as obvious with the other girls as it was with Beverly, but Rebecca thought that she was the only one there wearing a bra.
Knowing how much a bra could dig in if she fell asleep (or, looking at the size of the punchbowl, passed out), Rebecca found a reason to go up to her room. Something about needing her watch. Once there she grabbed her watch and ditched her bra before going back down to the main room with its punchbowl. Once back downstairs she snagged another glass of punch and let the warm feeling of the vodka spread through her.
"Look at me, running around and doing everything." Beverly giggled. "I must look just like my mom usually does. Oh, there's the timer! The cherry balls are ready!"
Candace had never met Mrs. Faber, but thought that unless the woman was a world class MILF there was no way Beverly could look like her. Emptying and refilling her glass, Candace felt a bit resentful at how Beverly fulfilled the stereotype of the blonde airhead. She had seen Beverly in a couple of plays and knew that the girl could act, but Candace couldn't help wonder how the girl managed to deal with the classroom and academic part of her degree.
Upstairs in her room, Elizabeth was scanning through her paper one last time. She could hear the others downstairs watching TV and having fun and longed to join them, but if her paper hit her prof's inbox before December 25th she would get two bonus marks. Not that she really needed those marks to pass the course but if she wanted to get into graduate school she had to get as close to a 4.0 GPA as she could. She had thrown on some PJs, just to get them to shut up (and begrudged them the time it took, even though she hadn't paused long enough to get her underwear off before changed), and other than that she was letting them have all the fun.
Sometimes she felt that all she did was study while her housemates had fun, but graduate school beckoned. Someday she knew that she would be Doctor Elizabeth Tanners and then everything would be perfect.
Todd Grant had a doctorate and knew that his life wasn't perfect. As he shivered in front of the house he wondered how he gotten here - in more ways than one. Whenever the economy took a nosedive pure research was always the first thing to be cut and when the lab downsized Todd had found himself on the street with few prospects. He didn't want to have to move back in with parents (and fulfil the stereotype of the 30something academic egghead who couldn't make it in the real world) so when he had spotted that ad he had gone for it.
Normally he wouldn't have given the posting a second chance. It was only a short-term contract and it didn't pay much, but the job included meals and lodging. Since it was isolation work he wouldn't have much to spend his money on and Todd was sure he could save his money as a cushion until he found a real job. Plus he figured that it might be a back door into NASA. It had to be something to do with space exploration - otherwise why would anyone want someone with a doctorate in quantum physics working in isolation in the far north?
After a great interview, Todd had packed his few belonging into storage and headed north on a series of ever shrinking airplanes. He started on a normal commercial flight, at one point flew in a WWII era plane, and the last leg had been in a four-seater prop plane. As they flew through the dark northern skies Todd told himself it was for the best. That being trapped on the top of the world had to be better than moving back in with his parents.
Then came the surprise.
The trip didn't end at a NASA research station but at place run by the Fat Man (Todd couldn't think of calling him anything else). Somehow a knowledge of quantum physics could be linked to various devices that the Fat Man had and Todd was only one of a series of surprised people with advanced degrees who had been recruited to help the Fat Man this year. A bunch of training, one day of real work, then sit back and do his own thing while he waited for the weather to break so he could fly back south.
Thinking about devices, Todd jammed his hand into the pocket of his oversized coat and took out something that looked like a classic Palm Pilot, the type they didn't make anymore.
"Why didn't go in through the chimney?"
"Because they have electric heat."
"Well what about a dryer vent?"
"It's the chimney or the door! Dryers don't enter into it."
Todd tried to ignore the squabbling was happening at knee level. It was coming from two of the Fat Man's full time employees. Todd had to think of them as employees because if he thought of them as elves he thought he might go mad. They employees who just happened to be short. Very short. And blue - blue skin with fiery red hair. The female one, Pick, was in a dress that looked far too flimsy for this weather while the male one, Nit, was in overalls - looking more like a miniature mechanic than anything else. But they were just short blue people, not elves. They were his 'assistants' and 'advisors' and backup in case something went wrong.
"Fine! We use the door." Pick grumbled. Then she brightened. "But first we coat the place with Christmas lights."
"We won't!" Nit scolded. "We aren't using that much power just for the looks."
That started a new round of squabbling, which Todd tried to ignore as he worked the PDA. He'd been hearing variation of the same debate all night: Pick always wanted to use more and more power while Nit wanted to use as little as possible.
"Um, is this right?" Todd asked.
"So he magics the door, but that's it." Nit declared.
"Okay." Pick agreed.
"This says we're in North America, but it's coming up as Knecht Ruprecht." Todd pointed out. "What gives?"
"Oh, mortals move and take their legends with them." Pick said in an offhanded way. "Now let's rock that door."
'She must have said people.' Todd told himself as he walked up to the door. 'People, not mortals. That's it. That's what she said.'
Todd told himself that, but he didn't really believe himself.
'At least I don't have to be Zwarte Piet.' Todd thought, trying to console himself. 'Now that's something I wouldn't want to do. If anyone found out then I'd never get another research jib. I'd rather have done Krampus than Zwarte Piet.'
Kimberly was flipping through the channels, trying to find something that wasn't a colourised bastardisation of a classic (because they all agreed that some shows should be in black and white) when the front door blew open. Actually blew, as if the wind had opened it when there was no way the wind could turn the knob much less undo the two locks and the chain. The girls shrieked in surprise. The clicker fell from Kimberly's hand, stopping on a channel where Ralph really wanted a BB gun, as they stared the door and the door blew shut behind Todd, Pick, and Nit.
Three girls stared at Todd while Rebecca stared at Pick and Nit.
"Um, does that red bag over your back mean anything?" Beverly asked hopefully.
"You mean you see them... You see something too?" Rebecca asked weakly, looking suspiciously at the punch.
"Is this some kind of strip-a-gram?" Kimberly asked, cross her arms over her chest to look serious (and cover the fact that she wasn't wearing a bra under her PJs).
"Um, you all see the blue guys?" Rebecca asked with a smile on her face. "Little blue guys. Everyone sees them, right?"
"What did we say about boys sleeping over?" Candace asked, rising and straightening the helm of her nightgown.
"That they have to come in the afternoon when everyone else is in class so a certain uptight bitch doesn't see them." Rebecca said dreamily. "Um, did someone dose the punch? Because friends don't dose friends. Not without warning. Okay? It's bad shit to do that. Always ask before putting something in my drink. Or at least warn me."
"Beverly Faber! Did you hire a strip-a-gram for Christmas Eve?" Kimberly asked, turning on her housemate. "Don't tell me this is another Christmas tradition because so help me..."
"I didn't hire anyone." Beverly said, her eyes still glued to the red sack that hung over Todd's shoulder.
"And if it was mushroom then maybe someone needs to call an ambulance." Rebecca asked, going down on her knees and shuffling towards where Pick stood. "Because I'm allergic to some mushroom."
"Look Beverly, if you want a Christmas Eve quickie then take him upstairs now, but he's not staying the night." Candace declared.
Todd was almost used to this. When people saw things that shouldn't be they tried to make sense of it, seizing on a possible explanation. He had gone through it at San... At the Fat Man's HQ and knew that he was still too firmly fixed in his own paradigm to accept every facet of his new job. As for the people he has visited tonight, only the kids (whose mindsets lacked the boundaries that came from knowing what was and wasn't possible) had accepted him as what he was really was. There were no kids here, but that girl with the big boobs seemed almost childlike.
Todd hoped that she wasn't "special" in the "ride the short bus" way as he tried not to panic.
"The readout said one and there's four." Todd hissed, hoping that advisors had advice. "We're on a schedule here. I don't have the time budgeted to deal with four."
"When expecting one and finding between three and five, use 36." Pick said in singsong voice, looking at Rebecca as the girl crawled over.
"A waste of power, but 36 it has always been and 36 it must be." Nit agreed with a humph. "That's what the song says."
"Now if it's chemical it's okay, but if it's shrooms then call 911." Rebecca said, now putting one of her hands on the floor to steady herself as she half shuffled, half crawled forward.
"Your boyfriend better not be enjoying seeing us like this." Candace declared. "If this is just some trick so he can see us before he does you then I'm leaving!"
Todd checked his PDA. Subroutine 36 was a complex one and he had supply a few parameters before it would work.
Rebecca finally reached Pick.
"Are you real?" Rebecca asked with a smile. She reached a finger forward and poked Pick in the mid-drift. Giggling, she asked: "Are you a fraggle?"
Pick giggled back, then glanced up and hissed: "Make with 36 already. They're touching the elf. No one touches the elf."
Elizabeth attached the final supporting document to the email.
"One point two megs, and worth every byte." Elizabeth said to herself. "And in before the deadline. Now I can go down and join the party."
Todd entered the last variable and process 36 stared. A quantum shift occurred; the house (and all its occupants) shifted into a quantum event where the variable of time was missing. In theory things would continue to happen in a linear order but until the quantum event collapsed the house was effectively outside the normal space time continuum. Nothing could enter or leave the bubble until the house was returned to the continuum and when it did then it would seem (to the outside world) that no time had passed.
In theory. At least Todd thought that was the theory and hoped that was what was happening, because if it wasn't then he didn't have a clue about what was happening.
On the TV, Ralph's mother froze in place. The phone was in her hand and she was making a phone call, but it was as if someone had hit pause.
And they didn't have TiVo.
Elizabeth looked at her screen in shock, then horror. The bar wasn't advancing. The "uploading" bar, which had been steadily filling as her computer sent its information on the cable modem, had frozen. Her paper wasn't being sent, and if she didn't fix the problem soon then she would miss the deadline and the two extra points!
"Um, yeah, excuse me?" Todd said.
Kimberly and Candace looked away from Beverly and Rebecca looked up from Pick.
"Now that I have your attention, um, there seems to be a bit of mix up... Um, is there a kid in the house? Say six or eight year old? Um, well, yeah this awkward." Todd began.
"Awkward?" Candace sputtered, straightening her hem again. "You're completely dressed and I'm not and this is awkward for you?"
"Yeah, well, um, tonight I'm doing a temp job. I'm filling in for Knecht Ruprecht and doing his job tonight." Todd continued.
"Filling in for who?" Kimberly asked.
Rebecca reached for the hem of Pick's dress, only to have her hand batted away.
"Knecht Ruprecht." Beverly said, pronouncing the name perfectly. "My Nana told me all about him. How he helps Father Christmas. Her stories always made Christmas special. So very special."
Then Beverly's eyes went downcast.
"But Nana isn't here this Christmas."
Todd felt a bit depressed to hear that.
"She's at my Aunt Freda's place telling those stories to my cousins." Beverly continued. "And not to me."
"Um, is this some weird performance art bit?" Kimberly asked. "Beverly, is this a project for one of your classes?"
Todd glanced at his PDA. The name that everyone was calling that girl was the same one on his PDA and the girl had sort of a childlike air about her. As maybe not "special" but not all grounded in the rough world of reality.
"Beverly is it? Well then you know what I'm going ask." Todd began.
"Oh, I've been very nice." Beverly said with a smile. "Very nice. Ask anyone. You can even ask my ex-boyfriend; I was always nice to him."
"That's being naughty, not nice." Candace pointed out.
"That's not the question Knecht Ruprecht asks." Todd chided. "Can you pray?"
"Oh, that question." Beverly said, still smiling. "Um, sure. Okay, here's one: Now I lay me down to sleep, a bag of peanuts by feet. If I die before I wake, give them to my brother Jake."
Everyone stared at her. Even Rebecca looked away from Pick to stare at Beverly.
"Only I don't have a brother Jake." Beverly continued. Then she frowned. "And I really don't want to die. Dying would be bad, so could we skip that part? Um, how was that? Does it count?"
Todd looked at his assistants. Both of them just shrugged.
"Um, sure, I guess. And don't worry about the dying part." Todd said, unslinging the bag. "Now you get a present."
"Oh goodie." Beverly squealed.
Todd reached in his red bag and took out a perfectly wrapped present.
"Here you go." Todd said, then he turned to Kimberly.
"And can you pray?" Todd asked.
"Go fuck yourself." Kimberly snapped.
"Um, well how about you?" Todd asked Candace.
"Get lost you creep." Candace answered.
"Um, that's not a good idea." Beverly said, frowning.
Todd frowned, then looked down to Rebecca (who was still on the floor).
"How about you? Can you pray?"
"Well I can go down on my knees." Rebecca purred. "But I don't pray down here. But I gave made a lot of boys go 'oh god, oh god'. Does that count?"
"Um I don't think so." Todd muttered.
"It doesn't." Pick snapped, backing away from Rebecca.
"You're right it doesn't count." Nit agreed. "Not even if you like bending down in front of short people."
"Hey!" Pick said, twirling to give Nit the evil eye.
"I said it doesn't count." Nit said. Then Nit looked at Todd. "Nope, it doesn't count. That means that one gets her present and the others ..."
"Yeah, okay." Todd sighed.
"So are you leaving or am I calling the police?" Candace asked, holding up her phone.
"Call the ambulance while you're at." Rebecca asked. "Just in case it's mushrooms."
"It's so easy to fake it." Todd complained, reaching into his bag again. "Almost anything can will do. Even something about peanuts. I've been doing this for hours, been all Europe, and you're the first ones who didn't pray."
"Why aren't I getting a signal?" Candace asked. "We have great reception here."
"This house is cut off from reality, being in a quantum indeterminate, so it can't interact with the rest of the world until the quantum uncertainty is resolved." Todd explained.
"Say what?" Kimberly asked.
"It's magic." Pick explained.
"I like magic." Rebecca giggled.
"Not this type you won't." Nit grumbled. "And don't waste magic to do it. Bad enough we had to waste an out of time thing here. No, the out of time will last long enough for the old fashion way."
"Come on, give them another chance." Beverly asked, hitting him with her best smile and jiggle. A jiggle that looked very impressive in her babydolls.
"Sorry. I realise that you don't hear this often from guys, but the answer is no." Todd answered, fishing around in his bag.
Beverly pouted. Seeing her pout Todd wished he could change things, but he couldn't. He wasn't the one who decided these things.
"So are you gay or something?"
Todd choked, and Pick said "No, he's not that happy about having to do this."
"I'm not... Okay, they still use the old meaning of gay and I'm not either of them. But I'm sorry; it's one question, one answer and I can't change things. Sorry."
"But..." Beverly pouted.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kimberly asked.
"Ah, we have a volunteer." Todd mentioned. "And I think I've found what I'm looking for."
Todd took his arm from the bag, and with it a long cane. Not one that would support anyone's weight but one that wouldn't have looked out of place in any Victorian schoolroom.
"And what the fuck is that for?" Kimberly demanded.
"Something that's about to take an appropriate shape." Todd said nervously. "At least I hope it will. I don't have a lot of training on this one."
"One what?" Kimberly demanded.
"It's a magic item." Pick supplied.
"It's a quantum flux event horizon in physical form." Todd corrected.
"It's changing shape." Rebecca giggled.
"It's paddle!" Kimberly said in horror.
Not just any paddle. It was an exact duplicate of Williamson County Silver Sky Water Park souvenir paddle. Something that had haunted Kimberly's dreams for years. The first time she saw one she thought it was just a tacky souvenir, but that was before she and another girl had been fooling, splashing and running where they weren't supposed to, around when the other girl's mother can caught them. Kimberly had stared in horror as that little tacky souvenir had been produced from the woman's purse and used to turn her new playmate's bum bright red. Later she had watched in horror as her own mother bought the same paddle at the gift shop. For the rest of that trip she had quaked in fear every time her mother opened her purse - but her mother never used it. For all Kimberly knew, her mother had never carried that paddle much less intended to use it - that to her mother it was just a souvenir of that place, not something to spank with.
Slowly the memories of that paddle had faded, but now they were back in spades.
"Um, what... What's that for." Kimberly stuttered.
"For you." Todd said bluntly. "It's not as if either of us has a choice."
"He's right." Nit added. "He asks the question and you answer it. You say yes and you get a present. You say no and you get a beating. It's the rules."
"Yeah, the rules." Pick agreed. "He gots no choice. It's his job description."
"Sad but true." Todd sighed. "This has to happen."
"What the fuck?" Kimberly asked, backing away.
Not that a few steps helped. Todd was there, grabbing her by her arm. He had never been one to workout, but the suit (and the position) lent him some funky kind of power. He was pulling her over to cheep couch (students couldn't afford quality furniture) while Kimberly barely put up a struggle - she was in too much shock to really resist.
"Do you have to?" Beverly whined, cradling her present in her hands.
Todd didn't answer with words. He just dragged Kimberly over his knees, pulling down the bottoms of her PJs as he did. As Rebecca had thought, she hadn't worn anything under them.
Todd looked down on her backside. This late in December he couldn't tell what kind of swimsuit she normally wore; all traces of her summer tan were gone. Then he brought the little paddle down and started to add colour to her milky white backside.
A loud smack filled the room.
"Let me go!" Kimberly raged.
She started to squirm; by the time she finished Todd had a firm hold on her. One of her arms was trapped between their bodies and Todd had the other held high on her back while her left leg was wedged under his right one.
Candace had stood stock still when Kimberly had been seized, then slowly began to back away, heading towards the kitchen. Rebecca's eyes got big.
"Bad trip man." Rebecca muttered, moving away from Pick.
Pick grinned and looked Nit.
"Now we have to. No choice. It's gotta happen. He can't handle them all by himself." Pick crowed.
"We don't gotta." Nit grunted.
Todd brought the paddle down hard again, painting a second splotch of pink on Kimberly's backside.
"Let me go." Kimberly screamed as Candace inched closer to the kitchen and Rebecca started to shuffle to the front door.
"They're moving!" Pick exclaimed joyously. "We gotta!"
"Maybe. But just a bit." Nit grunted.
As the paddle came down for a third time a wave of coloured streams of ribbons shot out from Pick's arms, practically cocooning Rebecca. Pit was far more conservative; a single ribbon shot from each arm to bind Candace. There was far less ribbon involved but they were no less effective in restraining her.
"You wrapped them up?" Beverly asked, not really believing her eyes.
Todd brought the paddle done again.
"You wrapped them up like presents?" Beverly asked in disbelief.
"Mine's wrapped up better than his." Pick sang.
"I used less tape." Nit countered.
Todd smacked Kimberly again.
"But mine has a bow on it." Pick pointed out, and with a gesture there was a pink bow on Rebecca's head.
"Why are you doing this? WhYYYYYYY" Kimberly sobbed as the paddle smacked down again.
"Because it's in the job description and you got the question wrong." Todd said, landing a smack on her right thigh. "It's nothing personal, just the economy. You have no idea how hard it is in the real world."
Todd brought the paddle down twice more.
"I'd really love to be back in school but I couldn't land a fellowship and I'm not going back for another degree." Todd said. "Now let's get this over with."
With that he started to land a flurry of smacks.
"Why aren't you working?" Elizabeth moaned. "Why aren't you working?"
She opened another browser window and her home page popped up.
Elizabeth wanted to cry. She could hear the others enjoying themselves downstairs. They had gone from Christmas shows to something that sounded like a horror one; Elizabeth knew that Beverly was probably freaking about that, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Her paper wasn't being sent and that was all that mattered. She was losing those bonus points!
In frustration, she clicked on an article on her homepage. To her amazement it didn't load.
"Of course!" Elizabeth cried. "It was cached! My home page was cached! The internet isn't working. It's something that I can fix."
And once it was fixed she could go down and join in the fun.
Kimberly was sobbing and kicked out and Todd knew that he was done. He didn't know how he knew, he just knew. He rolled Kimberly off his lap and left her laying face down the floor. Looking around, he decided that Candace was next. Todd walked towards her and the ribbons holding her began to dissolve as magically as they had appeared.
"Let of me." Candace pleaded. "You aren't going to paddle me."
"No I won't." Todd agreed, grabbing her arm. "Let's see what I am going to do."
He shook the paddle and as he did its shape shifted. When the shifting stopped Todd was holding a hairbrush.
A hairbrush that horrified Candace. The one and only time she had been caught smoking there had been a hairbrush that had looked exactly like this one. Of course it was used over her jeans and she had only been given three whacks, just enough to get her attention. That had been the point, to get her attention, so her jeans hadn't had to come down and there hadn't been even a handful of smack. After seeing Kimberly get it, Candace doubted that this time would be anything like the only other time a hairbrush had been used on her butt.
On the way to the couch, Pick twisted her finger and pointed. Suddenly the hem of Candace's nightgown was above her bellybutton - exposing her bikini panties.
"No! You can't do that!" Candace protested.
"Stop wasting power." Nit chided.
"It's saving time." Pick countered. "The less 36 has to work the less power 36 uses the less power gets used so I'm helping so there! Plifff."
Candace was lacking tan lines, but if this had been summer Todd would have seen the lines left by Candace's modest swimsuit. Not that she was overly shy but Candace didn't believe in flashing her body at men and for Todd to see her this way... While Kimberly's punishment hadn't started until the first whack of the paddle, but Candace's began the moment that Todd saw her panties.
Not that Todd was making a point of looking. Pick's comment about saving power reminded him about his training. How it had been hammered in again and again that the Fat Man needed them to stay inside their budget. Something about the power of the belief being tapped. Todd wasn't sure how the model worked and thought it sounded depressingly close to Rupert Sheldrake's claptrap about morphogenetic fields, but that comment reminded him that even with time stopped he couldn't spend all night here.
"Stop struggling." Todd chided, forcing Candace over his lap. "This is going to happen."
"Please don't take down my panties. Please don't." Candace begged. "They're so thin and they don't have any padding and please don't take them down."
"Sorry, but rules are rules." Todd said, actually meaning it as he spoke.
When Todd tugged down Candace's panties the girl stopped struggling. She went ridged, her legs and butt cheeks clinched tightly together. This nightmare might be happening and maybe this stranger had to take her panties down, but Candace wasn't going to let him see anything more than she had to.
'Thank God he's using a brush.' Candace thought. 'And not touching my bum with his fingers.'
Then the hairbrush came down with a loud whack her right cheek and Candace was wondering if maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be better if he was using his hand on her backside. That first whack had felt harder than she remembered those long ago ones feeling. Then came a second whack, one on her left cheek, and it was all that Candace could do to stop herself from kicking out of reflect.
'No kicking.' Candace vowed to herself. 'No kicking and no squirming. He's not going to see anything but my bum.'
A third whack, one that landed squarely on the middle of her bum, challenged her resolve, but Candace still didn't move.
As Candace was stoically taking her spanking, Kimberly had recovered to the point where she was trying to crawl towards the kitchen. Suddenly, without moving, Pick was in front of her.
"Oh no you don't." Pick scolded. "She watched your spanking so you have to watch hers. It's only fair. And those PJs stay down!"
Trapped by the blue skinned elf, Kimberly lay on her stomach, rubbing at her throbbing butt. Glancing up she couldn't help wondering how Candace could lay there so meekly.
As the brush crashed down again, Candace was wondering the same thing. So far she was still pressing her cheeks together but it was getting harder and harder to do that every time the brush crashed down. Then the brush hit her right thigh and Candace reacted by instinct. Her right leg shot out straight, shifting and spreading her cheeks. She didn't spread them all the way but they shifted. They were no longer pressed closely together.
With that crack in the dike, Candace went wild. Kicking and squirming as if she was alone, as if there wasn't a strange man looking down at her bum. It wasn't until Candace realised that with one leg up and the other down her thighs no longer had any contact at all. None at all.
A thought tore through the throbbing in her bottom - her legs were open. A man, a strange man, was looking down at her and her legs were open. He was looking from the top so the view wasn't as extreme, but he was looking and she didn't even know the man's name!
There were tears before, but that realisation brought true wailing and Candace slammed her legs together - almost trapping the hairbrush between her thighs. Sobbing uncontrollably, Candace put her legs together, twisting her ankles together in a death grip. The burning was unbearable as her throbbing cheeks pressed together but she wasn't going to give that stranger so much as another peep.
Not that Todd really noticed. He didn't have much (well, any) experience spanking girls, women, or anyone else. He has assumed that Kimberly's reaction was the common one, but Candace acting differently didn't come as a huge surprise. Everyone was different so why shouldn't girls act differently when they get spanked? He would have been shocked and a bit embarrassed if he knew the reasons behind her actions, but even if he knew then he would still have to spanked her. It was the job, not something that he had chosen to do.
Candace didn't open her legs again. Not When Todd finally finished and he helped her to the floor.
"This can't be happening." Elizabeth moaned. "It can't be!"
She had tried packet after packet and nothing. It was like her computer wasn't connect to the net, but she had checked the connection - plugging and unplugging it twice.
"Maybe there's something wrong with the cable?" Elizabeth asked herself. "If there is then I can put everything on a thumb drive and send it from another computer."
As she searched for the cause of her problem, Elizabeth never noticed that the clock on her computer hadn't changed since the email stopped sending.
Rebecca was struggling against her bonds when they disappeared. She got two steps towards the front door before Todd grabbed her arm, surprising both of them with his iron grip.
"Stop!" Rebecca pleaded. "You don't have to do this!"
"So let's see what shape it take now." Todd said, shaking the hairbrush.
Rebecca knew that she should be struggling (running for the door or kicking this wannabe Santa in the nuts or something) but she couldn't. Her eyes were fixed on the wooden hairbrush as it shifted shapes. Changing into...
Rebecca gasped when she saw the strap. It wasn't just any strap, it was THAT STRAP!
Rebecca had been eight when the McCoys moved into the neighbour. The McCoys had a girl around Rebecca's age and the McCoy were a nice family. Mrs. McCoy was an outgoing woman, always there with a hug hello. Rebecca didn't think twice about the woman's habit of giving a couple of love taps with every hug, not until they had been there for a few weeks and she had gone over for a sleepover. Rebecca couldn't help noticing a piece of leather hanging on the wall and asked Mrs. McCoy about it.
Mrs. McCoy had just given Rebecca a tight hug and a pair of love taps, then said: "You see in this house when a little girl is naughty then that strap comes down on their bums."
Then Mrs. McCoy had given Rebecca another pair of love taps; firm ones this time.
Rebecca had almost peed herself.
The McCoy's had lived there for another two years and Rebecca had never slept over there again.
All that had happened years ago and Rebecca had practically forgotten about the entire thing - until now. Now all of those memories had just come crashing back, all at the sight of that strap.
"No! You can't!" Rebecca protested as Todd dragged her to the couch. "Come on, don't! I'll give you a blow job. We can have sex! I'll even let you stick it up my ass! Come on, we can have fun. Maybe a couple of smacks then the sex, right? You've got to up for sex. You told Beverly weren't gay so let's have some sex and blow off this spanking bullshit."
"Sorry, I have to." Todd said, watching as Pick's magic sent the T-shirt up to the base of her breasts. "It's the job."
"Come on! I'll suck your cock! I'll make you feel great. It will be the best that you ever had." Rebecca insisted. "Come on, don't do this! It's fucking Christmas. Let's just fuck!"
Todd forced her over his lap and pulled down her panties.
"Come up! I'm AHHH great in bed! ASSSSSSSK anyone!" Rebecca pleaded. "Ask them! I've OOWW kept them up nights! They've AHHH heard what I can DOOOOO!"
Todd tried to ignore Rebecca's offers, but it was hard. The way she was wiggling on his lap and talking about sex reminded him that she was girl and that she was practically naked and writhing on his lap. Not that he was really into spanking; he had seen some spanking porn and a couple of times he had landed a smack during the heat of passion but had never done anything like this. The movement, the bare bums, the offers of sex, all of that combined and started to do something for him.
He couldn't help it. Rebecca had a cute bum and the way the strap made it jiggle looked nice on her. The way her thighs twisted, especially when the strap kissed them, was doing something for him and Todd couldn't deny it. He tried to block out the continuing offers of sex as he strapped her, but it wasn't easy. From what she was offering, Rebecca sounded like an adventurous girl who was far more daring than any girl that Todd had ever dated.
'Or maybe when her back's against the wall she'll do whatever she can to get out of trouble.' Todd thought. 'But there's no way this can go anywhere. I can't ask her for phone number or anything - this is only what I have to do to get the job done.'
"EnimMMMAAAAS!" Rebecca offered. "I'm into water SPOORRRTS! We can DOOOOO AHH whatevERRR sob you waNNNNNT."
Kimberly was slowly recovering and amazed at what Rebecca was offering. She was starting to wonder if it was all a ploy or if Rebecca was really more of a party girl than she had ever thought.
'But if sucking his cock would have gotten me off his lap, I would have done it.' Kimberly admitted to herself. 'I would have gone down on him in a heartbeat if that would have gotten him to stop.'
Eventually Rebecca's sobs drowned out her offers. Somehow the room seemed quieter without them, even with the sobs and the ringing of the strap.
"The cord is okay." Elizabeth moaned. "Why the fuck won't my paper go? Why the hell is this happening to me?"
Todd helped Rebecca off his lap, hoping that his slight stiffness wasn't showing.
"Um, what about me?" Beverly asked.
"You?" Todd asked in surprise.
"Don't I get spanked?" Beverly asked.
"But, um..."
"You got the question right." Pick pointed out.
"Yeah, no secondies." Nit added.
"But you spanked them." Beverly pointed out. "And I have to live with them. And it's Christmas!"
"Um, yeah, I know it's Christmas, but what..." Todd said, looking for a way to leave.
"So if one kid gets a spanking then every kid gets a spanking." Beverly protested. "Even if it's not a real one. Come on, it's tradition!"
"Um, well, um..." Todd said.
"Well if it's tradition." Pick said, smiling.
"Traditions are important." Nit agreed.
"Um, well, um... Okay, I guess." Todd said, sitting back down the couch.
Beverly smiled and danced over to the couch. She bent over his lap, then reached down and pealed down her own panties to the bottom of her round orbs.
"A play spanking can be a tradition but a real one isn't." Nit said.
"Yeah, it's not a real one." Pick added. "That's not a tradition."
"Um, sure." Todd agreed. "Just a play one."
Five pats later Todd was ready to call an end to the play spanking, but Beverly just giggled and said "Another couple. Please?"
"This can't be happening." Elizabeth moaned. "The wires are all connected. Everything should be working. The cable's working fine."
To prove that to herself, Elizabeth turned on her TV. To her amazement it didn't come on.
"But the cable's working." Elizabeth muttered. "It's still on downstairs. They're still watching that horror show. What's happening here?"
Beverly stood, pulled up her panties, and smiled as Todd tried to tear his eyes off her cute bum.
"Now we all got spanked. So what's in my present? Can I open it now? It is it something nice?"
"Present are always nice." Todd answered, trying not to look at Beverly's impressive boobs. "But I have to go. I've got a schedule to keep and time will be starting up soon."
"Can't you stay for some punch?" Beverly asked.
Todd turned away and picked up his tools. The instrument had changed back to a cane so he picked that up with the same hand as the bag. With his free hand he reached for his PDA.
"Sorry." Todd said, checking his PDA. "Things are winding down and I have to be ready to leave the minute the realities sync. Besides, I don't think anyone else wants me here."
"You're damn right about that." Kimberly muttered, still rubbing at her backside as she faced away from Todd.
Todd was almost to the front door when he heard running feet.
Elizabeth ran down the stairs and into the main room.
"The cable is out in my room and my paper won't send so why is your movie still going down he-" Elizabeth froze in mid word as her brain tried to make sense what she saw. She expected everyone to be in their night clothes but not this. Everyone but Beverly had bare bums. Bare, red bums. Kimberly was lying face down, rubbing at her red bottom cheeks, crying softly. Candace was curled up, showing her backside but hiding her face as she cried. Rebecca was lying on her side with her legs together, rubbing at a red mark on the front of her thigh. Beverly still has a smile on her face, but even she looked a bit down at what happened. Then there was the stranger with the red bag, cane, and old PDA while a pair of blue midgets trailed him.
"What the hell happened?" Elizabeth exclaimed. "Who's that?"
Todd looked at her then down at his assistants.
"Where did she come from?"
"When expecting one and finding between three and five, use 36." Pick repeated. Then she started to point, starting with Beverly. "One, two, three, four." Then she pointed at Elizabeth and said: "Five."
"But what do I do? We're almost out of time."
"Oh migawd is this a home invasion?" Elizabeth squeaked.
"When time is not there for manual application, automatic is authorised." Nit sighed. "Use the stick the other way."
"Are you... Did you..." Elizabeth stammered, trying to make sense of senseless things.
"Um, fine." Todd said, fumbling with his PDA.
"Get out!" Elizabeth ordered. "Get out now or I'm calling the cops."
"Can you pray?" Todd asked.
"Get out! Leave." Elizabeth insisted.
"I'll take that as a no."
Todd fiddled with the cane and pointed it at Elizabeth. A beam of light shot from it, circling Elizabeth's waist. Elizabeth was spun around. Her PJs were jerked down, exposing her floral panties. A rapid series of cracks rang out and Elizabeth screamed in pain.
"Um, her bottom wasn't bare?" Todd half said and half asked.
"Who thought she would have something under PJs." Nick asked.
Elizabeth screamed in pain. She pulled down her panties, exposing a series of 12 equally spaced lines. They started just below the small of her back and the last two were on the tops of her thighs.
"But canes work over clothes." Pit grumbled. "That's why they replaced birches."
"Birches were great." Nick said with a smile. "Why did we stop leaving them?"
"Weren't you listening? Canes replaced them." Pit reminded her.
"But we have to get going." Todd said, moving towards the door.
He opened it, exposing only the empty darkness of space. Then something clicked and reality was back. Todd moved quickly through the door as the television blared to life.
Elizabeth cried, yanked up her PJs, and ran back upstairs. Through tearstreaked eyes she saw the status bar on the email moving. Whatever the maniac had done to her and the others, her paper had been submitted before the deadline. Then she ran back downstairs and asked "What the fuck happened?"
"The Christmas spirit." Beverly said with a smile.
"What?" Elizabeth asked through her tears. "Why is my bum burning? What happened?"
The girls exchanged looks, trying to make sense of what happened. Then the TV was blaring: "Mom? What did I do?" as a series of smacks rang out on the TV show.
"That happened." Candace said, breaking into giggles. "Santa came in and spanked us all."
"No one will every believe this." Kimberly said. "No one will ever believe this. No one."
"I would." Beverly said.
"You and your spirit of Christmas." Rebecca said. "So the punch isn't dosed? Then I'm drinking it. As long as there's vodka there then I'm drinking it."
"That sounds great." Candace agreed. "Set me up with some. I need something to help me believe this is really real."
"Doesn't your red bum prove that it's real?" Kimberly asked.
"I know my bum hurts, but that guy and the blue people with red hair? I'll need something with an edge in it to make me believe this was real." Candace said.
"Let's all get into the Christmas cheer." Beverly agreed cheerfully.
"But what happened?" Elizabeth whined, rubbing her backside.
The five of them got drunk as they tried to work out what happened. What really happened. What they could never report to the authorities. They all agreed no one would ever believe them. When their sixth roommate, Michelle Stamos, returned in early January, she certainly didn't believe it.
"Yeah, sure." Michelle smirked. "A German Christmas legend came to our house and spanked you all."
"All except Beverly." Candace agreed.
"I got the answer right." Beverly said, smiling proudly. "It's the first time I got a test entirely rightly since I got to college."
"Bullshit." Michelle said. "That didn't happen."
"Oh yeah? Elizabeth, show her." Rebecca said. "Come on, you're the only who's still showing."
"I supposed it's nothing that I wouldn't show on the way to the shower." Elizabeth said.
Michelle stared at the fading lines and shrinking welts on Elizabeth's backside.
"Well okay, something happened to her, but a Christmas spirit? I mean, if I had stayed, would something from a kallikantzaros have come in the house and kicked us all?"
"Only if you really believed. Like Beverly does." Elizabeth said bitterly.
"Who doesn't believe in Christmas?" Beverly asked.
"Like you? No one." Candace said.
"Well I don't believe it." Michelle said. "Someone must have spiked the punch with acid or something."
"That does make sense." Rebecca agreed. "More sense than a Christmas spirit. Maybe someone went shopping for X and ended up with bad stuff."
While Michelle was disbelieving Christmas, Todd was recovering from the after party at the Fat Man's workshop. Everyone had been burned out on Christmas Day so the party didn't start until December 28th and lasted until the new year. After that killer blow out, everyone (especially the human temp workers) needed a few days to recover.
Todd was sipping something that he hoped would help settle his stomach when Pick and Nit came by.
"Good news." Pick said, twirling fast enough to raise the skirt of her dress. "The numbers are in! We did great!"
"We did good." Nit acknowledged.
"We did great!" Pick corrected. "You even earned a Christmas bonus."
"Um, I did?" Todd asked, who had been wondering how the job went.
He had only had to find the cane in the bag once. In all the other houses the kids had answered the question right. Sometimes it had been a stretch, a real stretch, but his assistants always nodded when he asked if them if something was good enough.
Of course those college girls hadn't been kids. There had been nothing kid like about any of them... Well, except maybe the childlike belief possessed by the curvaceous girl in the babydolls. A part of his mind was still focused on how he had spanked her. The one before her, the girl who offered sex to escape her strapping, was memorable, but Beverly had enjoyed how he had made her magnificent bottom globes jiggle. And the way all of those women had wiggled over his lap... Todd had never experimented with that and had been startled by how enjoyable it was to take a big girl over your lap and spank her bare bum.
"We used less magic than most." Pick pointed out. "You can thank me for that."
"And we impressed all the kids." Nit said, still twirling. "You can thank me for that."
"He did good." Pick pointed out. "Better most. Huge better than some."
Todd tried to focus on what they were saying and not on the rumoured fate of those who had done terrible jobs. For someone known to be jolly guy, the Fat Man could really crack down people who did a shitty job of keeping the kids amused.
"We collected far more power than we used." Pick said, twirling as she danced around the room.
"We got four adults to believe." Nit grunted. "That's a big thing. Keeping kids believing, that's good. Getting four adults? That's great."
"See!" Pick sang. "Even he says it's great."
"So you qualified for a Christmas bonus." Nit said. "A nice one."
"A really great one." Pick insisted.
"Um, great. What?" Todd asked.
"You get to learn magic." Pick sang.
"Um, what? Magic?" Todd asked.
"They wrote it down." Nit said, reaching into his pocket for some papers. "Um, let's see. A chance to learn a variation of applied quantum theory. A way to do some of the things you did then when you get to the real world."
"Applied quantum theory? Really?" Todd asked, thinking about how Candace hadn't moved until the very end. "What kind of applied quantum theory stuff?"
"Winter feast magic." Pick said, still dancing.
"The sort of stuff we did on the night." Nit said. "Create feasts, travel unseen, move quickly, seeing other versions of reality, and every thing we did then. Do you want to learn it?"
Todd thought about what they had done that night. About all the smiles on the faces of the children. Then he thought about those college girls. How he spanked one of them at a distance of more than 15 feet.
"I'd like to learn that." Todd decided. "I'd like to learn it very much."
That spring, when storms left the arctic and Todd could travel back from the north pole, he travelled in a series of ever increasingly large airplanes. Starting with the four-seater prop he made his way back to civilisation and commercial aircraft. As he did so, Todd carried a magic wand and special viewing crystal.
Resembling a monocle, it could be used to see many things - including viewing nearby quantum realities. In theory there were infinite quantum realities running parallel to this one and in the infinite reaches of reality there places where spankings happened. Todd had tested it, looking at various stewardess and seeing a version of reality where they getting a spanking. During the long series of flights home, Todd watched six different stewardess getting spanked.
All the way, Todd wondered how he would use his new magical powers... Make that how he would use his knowledge of applied quantum theory in his day to day life.
The one thing Todd knew was that he was going to experiment with spanking in his love life. Not that the love life of a theoretical researcher was full of excitement, especially when the researcher was unemployed and living off his savings, but Todd knew that he would make it work. Even if he had to tape his so-called magical powers to make it happen.
Todd wasn't the only one with a magical vision device. Pick and Nit watched Todd as he deplaned in his hometown.
"When do you think he'll learn the downside?" Nit asked.
"Downside? Oh, that he'll have to spend most of his time gathering power before he can use it? Is that what you mean?" Pick asked. "Soon enough."
"Here's hoping he gets laid soon." Nit noted. "I thought he was going explode with those college girls."
"He needs to get some soon." Pick agreed. "All those cute bums while he was on the job. Too bad the Fat Man has a no sex rule. At least not on the job."
"It's been a while since I saw those many nice bums." Nit noted. "Say what you want about the coke sponsorship, but I miss the days when we smacked bum after bum. Why don't we still leave straps, birches, and canes?"
"Those were the days." Pick agreed. "Hey, why don't we find one of those old canes? See how many lines you can paint on my backside?"
"Why not? It will pass the time 'til the next batch gets hired." Nit noted.
Goodgulf
But that had been when they had all been first year students living in the dorm. Now they were five serious students, renting a house together (after being matched by the unfathomable computer at student-housing department). This year they were all serious second year students, not stupid freshmen. They all now knew that Christmas break was for studying, not partying. Only one of their number had gone home for Christmas, and (unfortunately) that girl wasn't Beverly Faber.
Beverly was a drama arts major. The other four girls wondered how she stayed in school; she was bubbly and cheerful, but her four roommates agreed that she was an airhead. Pretty (if a bit top heavy), the buxom blonde contained enough Christmas cheer for the entire household. Beverly insisted on getting a tree, one she decorated with popcorn strings and cheap ornaments. Beverly decked out the house with holly and the odd sprig of mistletoe (which were sometimes ripped down after a visiting boyfriend kissed the wrong girl). If it was anyone other than Beverly it would have a case of bullying, but Beverly was too good natured to be accused of bullying. She just kept insisting that everyone get in the Christmas mood and went so Christmasy that the others had no choice but to follow along or be accused of being a gloomy gus. Anytime they balked Beverly just said "Come on, it's tradition" and if they didn't go along then her lip would waver and tears would threaten and no one really wanted to make the girl cry over some stupid little Christmas thing.
Michelle Stamos was the only one who escaped Beverly's seasonal tyranny; she was the girl who had gone home for Christmas. Not that she escaped the Christmas mood. Her emails back included countless pictures of her siblings and cousins, all sickly sweet and filled with the Christmas spirit (and cookies, chocolates, and Christmas candies). Between Beverly's countless repetitions of "but it's Christmas" and Michelle's emails from home, the only one guilty of grinch-like behaviour was Elizabeth Tanners, the house nerd. She had a term paper due on December 24 and no amount of trying (or pleading) would get her away from her computer.
Things reached a fevered pitch on Christmas Eve.
"Come on, it's a Christmas tradition." Beverly urged. "It's Christmas Eve. We have to get into the Christmas mood."
"We put up the decorations." Kimberly Gladstone protested.
"And the holly." Rebecca Loughlin said.
"And the mistletoe isn't going back up over that doorway." Candace Olsen added.
"Just because Michelle's boyfriend kissed you..." Beverly countered.
"Kissed and GOOSED." Candace protested. "Mistletoe might let someone steal a kiss but there's no reason for someone's else's boyfriend's hand to be on my bum. Not unless he's nicer than Steve is and even then he's got to be much cuter than Steve. I can't see what Michelle sees in him, especially after he used mistletoe as an excuse to feel me up."
"But who cares about Steve?" Beverly protested. "It's Christmas Eve. We need to get into the Christmas spirit. Otherwise how will Santa know we're here?"
Kimberly, Rebecca, and Candace exchanged looks. All were secretly envying Elizabeth, who was locked in her room slaving over a paper and not stuck down here with a roommate who might, just might, still believe in Santa Claus.
At her age.
"Come on! It's tradition! We have to get into the Christmas spirit." Beverly insisted.
"Um, well, what do we have to do?" Candace asked dubiously.
"First, we need to make the Christmas punch." Beverly giggled. "I'll do that. Then we all change into our nightclothes. Nightgowns or PJs. We always change early on Christmas Eve and don't came back until afternoon on Christmas. It's part of my tradition!"
"I usually sleep in the nude." Rebecca reminded Beverly.
"So I can lend you something." Beverly said generously. "Come on, it's Christmas."
The three of them exchanged looks.
"Well come on! Otherwise Santa might not find us."
Beverly went off to the kitchen while the three of exchanged looks again.
"Do we have to change?" Rebecca asked.
"Do you want to try to tell Beverly that there's no such thing as Santa Claus." Kimberly asked.
"But she has to know." Candace protested. "She's not ten! She's in her second year at college. She has to know."
"This Beverly we're talking about." Kimberly reminded them. "Empty headed Beverly. I wouldn't be surprised if she believes the stork brings babies. Or that babies are found in the cabbage patch. Or that kissing in a bikini can get you pregnant. Are you really sure that she knows the truth about Santa? Really sure? And do you want to be the one to tell her if she does believe?"
They kept exchanging looks, hoping that someone would volunteer for that most awful of duties. No one did. None of them wanted to see a hurt look on Beverly's face.
"Okay, can someone lend me something to wear?" Rebecca asked, capitulating. "There's no way I can fit my B's in something designed for her D's. I'd be swimming in any of her tops."
"Sure, I've got something you can wear." Candace offered.
"Same here." Kimberly offered. "And if you can always raid Michelle's closet. Just as long as you wash before she gets back."
As they headed back upstairs, Candace called: "Elizabeth, Beverly is making us change for Christmas and..."
"Go away!" Elizabeth called through her locked door. "I'm almost done."
"But..."
"I'm working on my conclusion! I can't talk! If I talk I might forget what I need to write."
"But..."
"Go away! Stop talking to me!" Elizabeth shrieked. "I can't lose track of anything. Fractal equations don't write themselves. God! I almost used gamma when I meant beta! Sigma beta, not sigma gamma! Just leave me alone! I'll talk to you tomorrow."
"But we're all changing into PJs so if you do come down wear yours." Candace called. "Even Rebecca is wearing them."
"Fine! I'll change! Now go away! I need to get this done!!!"
Twenty minutes later, the three girls gathered downstairs in the living room they shared. There was a Christmas special on the TV, punch on the coffee table, and good smells drifting in from the kitchen. It was almost enough to make them remember Christmases past when they were young and still believed in Christmas miracles.
"Where did she get a punchbowl?" Candace asked.
"She must have brought it from home, I guess." Kimberly guessed. "Maybe she had in her room."
"Or maybe she bought it because she's ODing on Christmas." Rebecca suggested.
"You changed!" Beverly squealed, coming out of the kitchen with a tray of Christmas cookies, still hot from the oven. "Oh that's wonderful. Everyone's getting into the Christmas spirit! This is so wonderful. Help yourself to some punch."
"Um, sure." Rebecca said, helping herself to a glass. "Hey, this is good. What's in it?"
"Just some sprite, some pineapple juice, a bottle of cherries, ice cubes, and vodka." Beverly answered.
"Vodka?" Rebecca asked. "But you don't drink much."
"Well normally I don't, but it's Christmas." Beverly reminded them. "And since there's no kids around I only made the adult punch, not the kid's punch."
"What's in the kid's punch?" Candace asked, helping herself to glass.
"Sprite, some pineapple juice, a bottle of cherries, ice cubes, and no vodka." Beverly revealed. "That's always a lot fun at Christmas, watching the kids trying to sneak drinks from the adult bowl. Everyone knows they do it and half the time there's a bunch of drunk teens trying to act sober when even the little kids can see they're drunk."
"That's part of your Christmas tradition too?" Candace asked, sipping her drink.
"Of course it is." Beverly told her. "Now we eat cookies and chocolates and drink punch and wait for Santa."
Three girls exchanged looks, then started to hit the punch. They didn't know how much vodka was in but hoped it would be enough to take the edge off when Santa didn't come.
Rebecca couldn't help glancing at what the other girls were wearing. Beverly was in a set of babydolls, causing Rebecca to wonder if the girl would be wearing something like that home in front of male relatives. It was different when they were relatives but Rebecca thought she'd rather have a boy see her nude than when wearing that enticing outfit. As Beverly dashed here and there, making sure that everything was perfect, Rebecca couldn't help noticing how Beverly was bouncing around in her top.
'But knowing Beverly, she would wear that outfit in front of boy cousins and not know why they had hold a blanket or something over their laps.' Rebecca thought.
Kimberly's outfit was more sensible; a two piece flannel PJs set. They were the sort of thing that you could almost wear out in public. Candace had a nightgown on, but it went to her knees and was in no way as enticing or daring as Beverly babydolls. As for herself, Rebecca had changed into an oversized T-shirt and was wearing a bra and panties under it, and almost feeling overdressed. It wasn't as obvious with the other girls as it was with Beverly, but Rebecca thought that she was the only one there wearing a bra.
Knowing how much a bra could dig in if she fell asleep (or, looking at the size of the punchbowl, passed out), Rebecca found a reason to go up to her room. Something about needing her watch. Once there she grabbed her watch and ditched her bra before going back down to the main room with its punchbowl. Once back downstairs she snagged another glass of punch and let the warm feeling of the vodka spread through her.
"Look at me, running around and doing everything." Beverly giggled. "I must look just like my mom usually does. Oh, there's the timer! The cherry balls are ready!"
Candace had never met Mrs. Faber, but thought that unless the woman was a world class MILF there was no way Beverly could look like her. Emptying and refilling her glass, Candace felt a bit resentful at how Beverly fulfilled the stereotype of the blonde airhead. She had seen Beverly in a couple of plays and knew that the girl could act, but Candace couldn't help wonder how the girl managed to deal with the classroom and academic part of her degree.
Upstairs in her room, Elizabeth was scanning through her paper one last time. She could hear the others downstairs watching TV and having fun and longed to join them, but if her paper hit her prof's inbox before December 25th she would get two bonus marks. Not that she really needed those marks to pass the course but if she wanted to get into graduate school she had to get as close to a 4.0 GPA as she could. She had thrown on some PJs, just to get them to shut up (and begrudged them the time it took, even though she hadn't paused long enough to get her underwear off before changed), and other than that she was letting them have all the fun.
Sometimes she felt that all she did was study while her housemates had fun, but graduate school beckoned. Someday she knew that she would be Doctor Elizabeth Tanners and then everything would be perfect.
Todd Grant had a doctorate and knew that his life wasn't perfect. As he shivered in front of the house he wondered how he gotten here - in more ways than one. Whenever the economy took a nosedive pure research was always the first thing to be cut and when the lab downsized Todd had found himself on the street with few prospects. He didn't want to have to move back in with parents (and fulfil the stereotype of the 30something academic egghead who couldn't make it in the real world) so when he had spotted that ad he had gone for it.
Normally he wouldn't have given the posting a second chance. It was only a short-term contract and it didn't pay much, but the job included meals and lodging. Since it was isolation work he wouldn't have much to spend his money on and Todd was sure he could save his money as a cushion until he found a real job. Plus he figured that it might be a back door into NASA. It had to be something to do with space exploration - otherwise why would anyone want someone with a doctorate in quantum physics working in isolation in the far north?
After a great interview, Todd had packed his few belonging into storage and headed north on a series of ever shrinking airplanes. He started on a normal commercial flight, at one point flew in a WWII era plane, and the last leg had been in a four-seater prop plane. As they flew through the dark northern skies Todd told himself it was for the best. That being trapped on the top of the world had to be better than moving back in with his parents.
Then came the surprise.
The trip didn't end at a NASA research station but at place run by the Fat Man (Todd couldn't think of calling him anything else). Somehow a knowledge of quantum physics could be linked to various devices that the Fat Man had and Todd was only one of a series of surprised people with advanced degrees who had been recruited to help the Fat Man this year. A bunch of training, one day of real work, then sit back and do his own thing while he waited for the weather to break so he could fly back south.
Thinking about devices, Todd jammed his hand into the pocket of his oversized coat and took out something that looked like a classic Palm Pilot, the type they didn't make anymore.
"Why didn't go in through the chimney?"
"Because they have electric heat."
"Well what about a dryer vent?"
"It's the chimney or the door! Dryers don't enter into it."
Todd tried to ignore the squabbling was happening at knee level. It was coming from two of the Fat Man's full time employees. Todd had to think of them as employees because if he thought of them as elves he thought he might go mad. They employees who just happened to be short. Very short. And blue - blue skin with fiery red hair. The female one, Pick, was in a dress that looked far too flimsy for this weather while the male one, Nit, was in overalls - looking more like a miniature mechanic than anything else. But they were just short blue people, not elves. They were his 'assistants' and 'advisors' and backup in case something went wrong.
"Fine! We use the door." Pick grumbled. Then she brightened. "But first we coat the place with Christmas lights."
"We won't!" Nit scolded. "We aren't using that much power just for the looks."
That started a new round of squabbling, which Todd tried to ignore as he worked the PDA. He'd been hearing variation of the same debate all night: Pick always wanted to use more and more power while Nit wanted to use as little as possible.
"Um, is this right?" Todd asked.
"So he magics the door, but that's it." Nit declared.
"Okay." Pick agreed.
"This says we're in North America, but it's coming up as Knecht Ruprecht." Todd pointed out. "What gives?"
"Oh, mortals move and take their legends with them." Pick said in an offhanded way. "Now let's rock that door."
'She must have said people.' Todd told himself as he walked up to the door. 'People, not mortals. That's it. That's what she said.'
Todd told himself that, but he didn't really believe himself.
'At least I don't have to be Zwarte Piet.' Todd thought, trying to console himself. 'Now that's something I wouldn't want to do. If anyone found out then I'd never get another research jib. I'd rather have done Krampus than Zwarte Piet.'
Kimberly was flipping through the channels, trying to find something that wasn't a colourised bastardisation of a classic (because they all agreed that some shows should be in black and white) when the front door blew open. Actually blew, as if the wind had opened it when there was no way the wind could turn the knob much less undo the two locks and the chain. The girls shrieked in surprise. The clicker fell from Kimberly's hand, stopping on a channel where Ralph really wanted a BB gun, as they stared the door and the door blew shut behind Todd, Pick, and Nit.
Three girls stared at Todd while Rebecca stared at Pick and Nit.
"Um, does that red bag over your back mean anything?" Beverly asked hopefully.
"You mean you see them... You see something too?" Rebecca asked weakly, looking suspiciously at the punch.
"Is this some kind of strip-a-gram?" Kimberly asked, cross her arms over her chest to look serious (and cover the fact that she wasn't wearing a bra under her PJs).
"Um, you all see the blue guys?" Rebecca asked with a smile on her face. "Little blue guys. Everyone sees them, right?"
"What did we say about boys sleeping over?" Candace asked, rising and straightening the helm of her nightgown.
"That they have to come in the afternoon when everyone else is in class so a certain uptight bitch doesn't see them." Rebecca said dreamily. "Um, did someone dose the punch? Because friends don't dose friends. Not without warning. Okay? It's bad shit to do that. Always ask before putting something in my drink. Or at least warn me."
"Beverly Faber! Did you hire a strip-a-gram for Christmas Eve?" Kimberly asked, turning on her housemate. "Don't tell me this is another Christmas tradition because so help me..."
"I didn't hire anyone." Beverly said, her eyes still glued to the red sack that hung over Todd's shoulder.
"And if it was mushroom then maybe someone needs to call an ambulance." Rebecca asked, going down on her knees and shuffling towards where Pick stood. "Because I'm allergic to some mushroom."
"Look Beverly, if you want a Christmas Eve quickie then take him upstairs now, but he's not staying the night." Candace declared.
Todd was almost used to this. When people saw things that shouldn't be they tried to make sense of it, seizing on a possible explanation. He had gone through it at San... At the Fat Man's HQ and knew that he was still too firmly fixed in his own paradigm to accept every facet of his new job. As for the people he has visited tonight, only the kids (whose mindsets lacked the boundaries that came from knowing what was and wasn't possible) had accepted him as what he was really was. There were no kids here, but that girl with the big boobs seemed almost childlike.
Todd hoped that she wasn't "special" in the "ride the short bus" way as he tried not to panic.
"The readout said one and there's four." Todd hissed, hoping that advisors had advice. "We're on a schedule here. I don't have the time budgeted to deal with four."
"When expecting one and finding between three and five, use 36." Pick said in singsong voice, looking at Rebecca as the girl crawled over.
"A waste of power, but 36 it has always been and 36 it must be." Nit agreed with a humph. "That's what the song says."
"Now if it's chemical it's okay, but if it's shrooms then call 911." Rebecca said, now putting one of her hands on the floor to steady herself as she half shuffled, half crawled forward.
"Your boyfriend better not be enjoying seeing us like this." Candace declared. "If this is just some trick so he can see us before he does you then I'm leaving!"
Todd checked his PDA. Subroutine 36 was a complex one and he had supply a few parameters before it would work.
Rebecca finally reached Pick.
"Are you real?" Rebecca asked with a smile. She reached a finger forward and poked Pick in the mid-drift. Giggling, she asked: "Are you a fraggle?"
Pick giggled back, then glanced up and hissed: "Make with 36 already. They're touching the elf. No one touches the elf."
Elizabeth attached the final supporting document to the email.
"One point two megs, and worth every byte." Elizabeth said to herself. "And in before the deadline. Now I can go down and join the party."
Todd entered the last variable and process 36 stared. A quantum shift occurred; the house (and all its occupants) shifted into a quantum event where the variable of time was missing. In theory things would continue to happen in a linear order but until the quantum event collapsed the house was effectively outside the normal space time continuum. Nothing could enter or leave the bubble until the house was returned to the continuum and when it did then it would seem (to the outside world) that no time had passed.
In theory. At least Todd thought that was the theory and hoped that was what was happening, because if it wasn't then he didn't have a clue about what was happening.
On the TV, Ralph's mother froze in place. The phone was in her hand and she was making a phone call, but it was as if someone had hit pause.
And they didn't have TiVo.
Elizabeth looked at her screen in shock, then horror. The bar wasn't advancing. The "uploading" bar, which had been steadily filling as her computer sent its information on the cable modem, had frozen. Her paper wasn't being sent, and if she didn't fix the problem soon then she would miss the deadline and the two extra points!
"Um, yeah, excuse me?" Todd said.
Kimberly and Candace looked away from Beverly and Rebecca looked up from Pick.
"Now that I have your attention, um, there seems to be a bit of mix up... Um, is there a kid in the house? Say six or eight year old? Um, well, yeah this awkward." Todd began.
"Awkward?" Candace sputtered, straightening her hem again. "You're completely dressed and I'm not and this is awkward for you?"
"Yeah, well, um, tonight I'm doing a temp job. I'm filling in for Knecht Ruprecht and doing his job tonight." Todd continued.
"Filling in for who?" Kimberly asked.
Rebecca reached for the hem of Pick's dress, only to have her hand batted away.
"Knecht Ruprecht." Beverly said, pronouncing the name perfectly. "My Nana told me all about him. How he helps Father Christmas. Her stories always made Christmas special. So very special."
Then Beverly's eyes went downcast.
"But Nana isn't here this Christmas."
Todd felt a bit depressed to hear that.
"She's at my Aunt Freda's place telling those stories to my cousins." Beverly continued. "And not to me."
"Um, is this some weird performance art bit?" Kimberly asked. "Beverly, is this a project for one of your classes?"
Todd glanced at his PDA. The name that everyone was calling that girl was the same one on his PDA and the girl had sort of a childlike air about her. As maybe not "special" but not all grounded in the rough world of reality.
"Beverly is it? Well then you know what I'm going ask." Todd began.
"Oh, I've been very nice." Beverly said with a smile. "Very nice. Ask anyone. You can even ask my ex-boyfriend; I was always nice to him."
"That's being naughty, not nice." Candace pointed out.
"That's not the question Knecht Ruprecht asks." Todd chided. "Can you pray?"
"Oh, that question." Beverly said, still smiling. "Um, sure. Okay, here's one: Now I lay me down to sleep, a bag of peanuts by feet. If I die before I wake, give them to my brother Jake."
Everyone stared at her. Even Rebecca looked away from Pick to stare at Beverly.
"Only I don't have a brother Jake." Beverly continued. Then she frowned. "And I really don't want to die. Dying would be bad, so could we skip that part? Um, how was that? Does it count?"
Todd looked at his assistants. Both of them just shrugged.
"Um, sure, I guess. And don't worry about the dying part." Todd said, unslinging the bag. "Now you get a present."
"Oh goodie." Beverly squealed.
Todd reached in his red bag and took out a perfectly wrapped present.
"Here you go." Todd said, then he turned to Kimberly.
"And can you pray?" Todd asked.
"Go fuck yourself." Kimberly snapped.
"Um, well how about you?" Todd asked Candace.
"Get lost you creep." Candace answered.
"Um, that's not a good idea." Beverly said, frowning.
Todd frowned, then looked down to Rebecca (who was still on the floor).
"How about you? Can you pray?"
"Well I can go down on my knees." Rebecca purred. "But I don't pray down here. But I gave made a lot of boys go 'oh god, oh god'. Does that count?"
"Um I don't think so." Todd muttered.
"It doesn't." Pick snapped, backing away from Rebecca.
"You're right it doesn't count." Nit agreed. "Not even if you like bending down in front of short people."
"Hey!" Pick said, twirling to give Nit the evil eye.
"I said it doesn't count." Nit said. Then Nit looked at Todd. "Nope, it doesn't count. That means that one gets her present and the others ..."
"Yeah, okay." Todd sighed.
"So are you leaving or am I calling the police?" Candace asked, holding up her phone.
"Call the ambulance while you're at." Rebecca asked. "Just in case it's mushrooms."
"It's so easy to fake it." Todd complained, reaching into his bag again. "Almost anything can will do. Even something about peanuts. I've been doing this for hours, been all Europe, and you're the first ones who didn't pray."
"Why aren't I getting a signal?" Candace asked. "We have great reception here."
"This house is cut off from reality, being in a quantum indeterminate, so it can't interact with the rest of the world until the quantum uncertainty is resolved." Todd explained.
"Say what?" Kimberly asked.
"It's magic." Pick explained.
"I like magic." Rebecca giggled.
"Not this type you won't." Nit grumbled. "And don't waste magic to do it. Bad enough we had to waste an out of time thing here. No, the out of time will last long enough for the old fashion way."
"Come on, give them another chance." Beverly asked, hitting him with her best smile and jiggle. A jiggle that looked very impressive in her babydolls.
"Sorry. I realise that you don't hear this often from guys, but the answer is no." Todd answered, fishing around in his bag.
Beverly pouted. Seeing her pout Todd wished he could change things, but he couldn't. He wasn't the one who decided these things.
"So are you gay or something?"
Todd choked, and Pick said "No, he's not that happy about having to do this."
"I'm not... Okay, they still use the old meaning of gay and I'm not either of them. But I'm sorry; it's one question, one answer and I can't change things. Sorry."
"But..." Beverly pouted.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kimberly asked.
"Ah, we have a volunteer." Todd mentioned. "And I think I've found what I'm looking for."
Todd took his arm from the bag, and with it a long cane. Not one that would support anyone's weight but one that wouldn't have looked out of place in any Victorian schoolroom.
"And what the fuck is that for?" Kimberly demanded.
"Something that's about to take an appropriate shape." Todd said nervously. "At least I hope it will. I don't have a lot of training on this one."
"One what?" Kimberly demanded.
"It's a magic item." Pick supplied.
"It's a quantum flux event horizon in physical form." Todd corrected.
"It's changing shape." Rebecca giggled.
"It's paddle!" Kimberly said in horror.
Not just any paddle. It was an exact duplicate of Williamson County Silver Sky Water Park souvenir paddle. Something that had haunted Kimberly's dreams for years. The first time she saw one she thought it was just a tacky souvenir, but that was before she and another girl had been fooling, splashing and running where they weren't supposed to, around when the other girl's mother can caught them. Kimberly had stared in horror as that little tacky souvenir had been produced from the woman's purse and used to turn her new playmate's bum bright red. Later she had watched in horror as her own mother bought the same paddle at the gift shop. For the rest of that trip she had quaked in fear every time her mother opened her purse - but her mother never used it. For all Kimberly knew, her mother had never carried that paddle much less intended to use it - that to her mother it was just a souvenir of that place, not something to spank with.
Slowly the memories of that paddle had faded, but now they were back in spades.
"Um, what... What's that for." Kimberly stuttered.
"For you." Todd said bluntly. "It's not as if either of us has a choice."
"He's right." Nit added. "He asks the question and you answer it. You say yes and you get a present. You say no and you get a beating. It's the rules."
"Yeah, the rules." Pick agreed. "He gots no choice. It's his job description."
"Sad but true." Todd sighed. "This has to happen."
"What the fuck?" Kimberly asked, backing away.
Not that a few steps helped. Todd was there, grabbing her by her arm. He had never been one to workout, but the suit (and the position) lent him some funky kind of power. He was pulling her over to cheep couch (students couldn't afford quality furniture) while Kimberly barely put up a struggle - she was in too much shock to really resist.
"Do you have to?" Beverly whined, cradling her present in her hands.
Todd didn't answer with words. He just dragged Kimberly over his knees, pulling down the bottoms of her PJs as he did. As Rebecca had thought, she hadn't worn anything under them.
Todd looked down on her backside. This late in December he couldn't tell what kind of swimsuit she normally wore; all traces of her summer tan were gone. Then he brought the little paddle down and started to add colour to her milky white backside.
A loud smack filled the room.
"Let me go!" Kimberly raged.
She started to squirm; by the time she finished Todd had a firm hold on her. One of her arms was trapped between their bodies and Todd had the other held high on her back while her left leg was wedged under his right one.
Candace had stood stock still when Kimberly had been seized, then slowly began to back away, heading towards the kitchen. Rebecca's eyes got big.
"Bad trip man." Rebecca muttered, moving away from Pick.
Pick grinned and looked Nit.
"Now we have to. No choice. It's gotta happen. He can't handle them all by himself." Pick crowed.
"We don't gotta." Nit grunted.
Todd brought the paddle down hard again, painting a second splotch of pink on Kimberly's backside.
"Let me go." Kimberly screamed as Candace inched closer to the kitchen and Rebecca started to shuffle to the front door.
"They're moving!" Pick exclaimed joyously. "We gotta!"
"Maybe. But just a bit." Nit grunted.
As the paddle came down for a third time a wave of coloured streams of ribbons shot out from Pick's arms, practically cocooning Rebecca. Pit was far more conservative; a single ribbon shot from each arm to bind Candace. There was far less ribbon involved but they were no less effective in restraining her.
"You wrapped them up?" Beverly asked, not really believing her eyes.
Todd brought the paddle done again.
"You wrapped them up like presents?" Beverly asked in disbelief.
"Mine's wrapped up better than his." Pick sang.
"I used less tape." Nit countered.
Todd smacked Kimberly again.
"But mine has a bow on it." Pick pointed out, and with a gesture there was a pink bow on Rebecca's head.
"Why are you doing this? WhYYYYYYY" Kimberly sobbed as the paddle smacked down again.
"Because it's in the job description and you got the question wrong." Todd said, landing a smack on her right thigh. "It's nothing personal, just the economy. You have no idea how hard it is in the real world."
Todd brought the paddle down twice more.
"I'd really love to be back in school but I couldn't land a fellowship and I'm not going back for another degree." Todd said. "Now let's get this over with."
With that he started to land a flurry of smacks.
"Why aren't you working?" Elizabeth moaned. "Why aren't you working?"
She opened another browser window and her home page popped up.
Elizabeth wanted to cry. She could hear the others enjoying themselves downstairs. They had gone from Christmas shows to something that sounded like a horror one; Elizabeth knew that Beverly was probably freaking about that, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Her paper wasn't being sent and that was all that mattered. She was losing those bonus points!
In frustration, she clicked on an article on her homepage. To her amazement it didn't load.
"Of course!" Elizabeth cried. "It was cached! My home page was cached! The internet isn't working. It's something that I can fix."
And once it was fixed she could go down and join in the fun.
Kimberly was sobbing and kicked out and Todd knew that he was done. He didn't know how he knew, he just knew. He rolled Kimberly off his lap and left her laying face down the floor. Looking around, he decided that Candace was next. Todd walked towards her and the ribbons holding her began to dissolve as magically as they had appeared.
"Let of me." Candace pleaded. "You aren't going to paddle me."
"No I won't." Todd agreed, grabbing her arm. "Let's see what I am going to do."
He shook the paddle and as he did its shape shifted. When the shifting stopped Todd was holding a hairbrush.
A hairbrush that horrified Candace. The one and only time she had been caught smoking there had been a hairbrush that had looked exactly like this one. Of course it was used over her jeans and she had only been given three whacks, just enough to get her attention. That had been the point, to get her attention, so her jeans hadn't had to come down and there hadn't been even a handful of smack. After seeing Kimberly get it, Candace doubted that this time would be anything like the only other time a hairbrush had been used on her butt.
On the way to the couch, Pick twisted her finger and pointed. Suddenly the hem of Candace's nightgown was above her bellybutton - exposing her bikini panties.
"No! You can't do that!" Candace protested.
"Stop wasting power." Nit chided.
"It's saving time." Pick countered. "The less 36 has to work the less power 36 uses the less power gets used so I'm helping so there! Plifff."
Candace was lacking tan lines, but if this had been summer Todd would have seen the lines left by Candace's modest swimsuit. Not that she was overly shy but Candace didn't believe in flashing her body at men and for Todd to see her this way... While Kimberly's punishment hadn't started until the first whack of the paddle, but Candace's began the moment that Todd saw her panties.
Not that Todd was making a point of looking. Pick's comment about saving power reminded him about his training. How it had been hammered in again and again that the Fat Man needed them to stay inside their budget. Something about the power of the belief being tapped. Todd wasn't sure how the model worked and thought it sounded depressingly close to Rupert Sheldrake's claptrap about morphogenetic fields, but that comment reminded him that even with time stopped he couldn't spend all night here.
"Stop struggling." Todd chided, forcing Candace over his lap. "This is going to happen."
"Please don't take down my panties. Please don't." Candace begged. "They're so thin and they don't have any padding and please don't take them down."
"Sorry, but rules are rules." Todd said, actually meaning it as he spoke.
When Todd tugged down Candace's panties the girl stopped struggling. She went ridged, her legs and butt cheeks clinched tightly together. This nightmare might be happening and maybe this stranger had to take her panties down, but Candace wasn't going to let him see anything more than she had to.
'Thank God he's using a brush.' Candace thought. 'And not touching my bum with his fingers.'
Then the hairbrush came down with a loud whack her right cheek and Candace was wondering if maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be better if he was using his hand on her backside. That first whack had felt harder than she remembered those long ago ones feeling. Then came a second whack, one on her left cheek, and it was all that Candace could do to stop herself from kicking out of reflect.
'No kicking.' Candace vowed to herself. 'No kicking and no squirming. He's not going to see anything but my bum.'
A third whack, one that landed squarely on the middle of her bum, challenged her resolve, but Candace still didn't move.
As Candace was stoically taking her spanking, Kimberly had recovered to the point where she was trying to crawl towards the kitchen. Suddenly, without moving, Pick was in front of her.
"Oh no you don't." Pick scolded. "She watched your spanking so you have to watch hers. It's only fair. And those PJs stay down!"
Trapped by the blue skinned elf, Kimberly lay on her stomach, rubbing at her throbbing butt. Glancing up she couldn't help wondering how Candace could lay there so meekly.
As the brush crashed down again, Candace was wondering the same thing. So far she was still pressing her cheeks together but it was getting harder and harder to do that every time the brush crashed down. Then the brush hit her right thigh and Candace reacted by instinct. Her right leg shot out straight, shifting and spreading her cheeks. She didn't spread them all the way but they shifted. They were no longer pressed closely together.
With that crack in the dike, Candace went wild. Kicking and squirming as if she was alone, as if there wasn't a strange man looking down at her bum. It wasn't until Candace realised that with one leg up and the other down her thighs no longer had any contact at all. None at all.
A thought tore through the throbbing in her bottom - her legs were open. A man, a strange man, was looking down at her and her legs were open. He was looking from the top so the view wasn't as extreme, but he was looking and she didn't even know the man's name!
There were tears before, but that realisation brought true wailing and Candace slammed her legs together - almost trapping the hairbrush between her thighs. Sobbing uncontrollably, Candace put her legs together, twisting her ankles together in a death grip. The burning was unbearable as her throbbing cheeks pressed together but she wasn't going to give that stranger so much as another peep.
Not that Todd really noticed. He didn't have much (well, any) experience spanking girls, women, or anyone else. He has assumed that Kimberly's reaction was the common one, but Candace acting differently didn't come as a huge surprise. Everyone was different so why shouldn't girls act differently when they get spanked? He would have been shocked and a bit embarrassed if he knew the reasons behind her actions, but even if he knew then he would still have to spanked her. It was the job, not something that he had chosen to do.
Candace didn't open her legs again. Not When Todd finally finished and he helped her to the floor.
"This can't be happening." Elizabeth moaned. "It can't be!"
She had tried packet after packet and nothing. It was like her computer wasn't connect to the net, but she had checked the connection - plugging and unplugging it twice.
"Maybe there's something wrong with the cable?" Elizabeth asked herself. "If there is then I can put everything on a thumb drive and send it from another computer."
As she searched for the cause of her problem, Elizabeth never noticed that the clock on her computer hadn't changed since the email stopped sending.
Rebecca was struggling against her bonds when they disappeared. She got two steps towards the front door before Todd grabbed her arm, surprising both of them with his iron grip.
"Stop!" Rebecca pleaded. "You don't have to do this!"
"So let's see what shape it take now." Todd said, shaking the hairbrush.
Rebecca knew that she should be struggling (running for the door or kicking this wannabe Santa in the nuts or something) but she couldn't. Her eyes were fixed on the wooden hairbrush as it shifted shapes. Changing into...
Rebecca gasped when she saw the strap. It wasn't just any strap, it was THAT STRAP!
Rebecca had been eight when the McCoys moved into the neighbour. The McCoys had a girl around Rebecca's age and the McCoy were a nice family. Mrs. McCoy was an outgoing woman, always there with a hug hello. Rebecca didn't think twice about the woman's habit of giving a couple of love taps with every hug, not until they had been there for a few weeks and she had gone over for a sleepover. Rebecca couldn't help noticing a piece of leather hanging on the wall and asked Mrs. McCoy about it.
Mrs. McCoy had just given Rebecca a tight hug and a pair of love taps, then said: "You see in this house when a little girl is naughty then that strap comes down on their bums."
Then Mrs. McCoy had given Rebecca another pair of love taps; firm ones this time.
Rebecca had almost peed herself.
The McCoy's had lived there for another two years and Rebecca had never slept over there again.
All that had happened years ago and Rebecca had practically forgotten about the entire thing - until now. Now all of those memories had just come crashing back, all at the sight of that strap.
"No! You can't!" Rebecca protested as Todd dragged her to the couch. "Come on, don't! I'll give you a blow job. We can have sex! I'll even let you stick it up my ass! Come on, we can have fun. Maybe a couple of smacks then the sex, right? You've got to up for sex. You told Beverly weren't gay so let's have some sex and blow off this spanking bullshit."
"Sorry, I have to." Todd said, watching as Pick's magic sent the T-shirt up to the base of her breasts. "It's the job."
"Come on! I'll suck your cock! I'll make you feel great. It will be the best that you ever had." Rebecca insisted. "Come on, don't do this! It's fucking Christmas. Let's just fuck!"
Todd forced her over his lap and pulled down her panties.
"Come up! I'm AHHH great in bed! ASSSSSSSK anyone!" Rebecca pleaded. "Ask them! I've OOWW kept them up nights! They've AHHH heard what I can DOOOOO!"
Todd tried to ignore Rebecca's offers, but it was hard. The way she was wiggling on his lap and talking about sex reminded him that she was girl and that she was practically naked and writhing on his lap. Not that he was really into spanking; he had seen some spanking porn and a couple of times he had landed a smack during the heat of passion but had never done anything like this. The movement, the bare bums, the offers of sex, all of that combined and started to do something for him.
He couldn't help it. Rebecca had a cute bum and the way the strap made it jiggle looked nice on her. The way her thighs twisted, especially when the strap kissed them, was doing something for him and Todd couldn't deny it. He tried to block out the continuing offers of sex as he strapped her, but it wasn't easy. From what she was offering, Rebecca sounded like an adventurous girl who was far more daring than any girl that Todd had ever dated.
'Or maybe when her back's against the wall she'll do whatever she can to get out of trouble.' Todd thought. 'But there's no way this can go anywhere. I can't ask her for phone number or anything - this is only what I have to do to get the job done.'
"EnimMMMAAAAS!" Rebecca offered. "I'm into water SPOORRRTS! We can DOOOOO AHH whatevERRR sob you waNNNNNT."
Kimberly was slowly recovering and amazed at what Rebecca was offering. She was starting to wonder if it was all a ploy or if Rebecca was really more of a party girl than she had ever thought.
'But if sucking his cock would have gotten me off his lap, I would have done it.' Kimberly admitted to herself. 'I would have gone down on him in a heartbeat if that would have gotten him to stop.'
Eventually Rebecca's sobs drowned out her offers. Somehow the room seemed quieter without them, even with the sobs and the ringing of the strap.
"The cord is okay." Elizabeth moaned. "Why the fuck won't my paper go? Why the hell is this happening to me?"
Todd helped Rebecca off his lap, hoping that his slight stiffness wasn't showing.
"Um, what about me?" Beverly asked.
"You?" Todd asked in surprise.
"Don't I get spanked?" Beverly asked.
"But, um..."
"You got the question right." Pick pointed out.
"Yeah, no secondies." Nit added.
"But you spanked them." Beverly pointed out. "And I have to live with them. And it's Christmas!"
"Um, yeah, I know it's Christmas, but what..." Todd said, looking for a way to leave.
"So if one kid gets a spanking then every kid gets a spanking." Beverly protested. "Even if it's not a real one. Come on, it's tradition!"
"Um, well, um..." Todd said.
"Well if it's tradition." Pick said, smiling.
"Traditions are important." Nit agreed.
"Um, well, um... Okay, I guess." Todd said, sitting back down the couch.
Beverly smiled and danced over to the couch. She bent over his lap, then reached down and pealed down her own panties to the bottom of her round orbs.
"A play spanking can be a tradition but a real one isn't." Nit said.
"Yeah, it's not a real one." Pick added. "That's not a tradition."
"Um, sure." Todd agreed. "Just a play one."
Five pats later Todd was ready to call an end to the play spanking, but Beverly just giggled and said "Another couple. Please?"
"This can't be happening." Elizabeth moaned. "The wires are all connected. Everything should be working. The cable's working fine."
To prove that to herself, Elizabeth turned on her TV. To her amazement it didn't come on.
"But the cable's working." Elizabeth muttered. "It's still on downstairs. They're still watching that horror show. What's happening here?"
Beverly stood, pulled up her panties, and smiled as Todd tried to tear his eyes off her cute bum.
"Now we all got spanked. So what's in my present? Can I open it now? It is it something nice?"
"Present are always nice." Todd answered, trying not to look at Beverly's impressive boobs. "But I have to go. I've got a schedule to keep and time will be starting up soon."
"Can't you stay for some punch?" Beverly asked.
Todd turned away and picked up his tools. The instrument had changed back to a cane so he picked that up with the same hand as the bag. With his free hand he reached for his PDA.
"Sorry." Todd said, checking his PDA. "Things are winding down and I have to be ready to leave the minute the realities sync. Besides, I don't think anyone else wants me here."
"You're damn right about that." Kimberly muttered, still rubbing at her backside as she faced away from Todd.
Todd was almost to the front door when he heard running feet.
Elizabeth ran down the stairs and into the main room.
"The cable is out in my room and my paper won't send so why is your movie still going down he-" Elizabeth froze in mid word as her brain tried to make sense what she saw. She expected everyone to be in their night clothes but not this. Everyone but Beverly had bare bums. Bare, red bums. Kimberly was lying face down, rubbing at her red bottom cheeks, crying softly. Candace was curled up, showing her backside but hiding her face as she cried. Rebecca was lying on her side with her legs together, rubbing at a red mark on the front of her thigh. Beverly still has a smile on her face, but even she looked a bit down at what happened. Then there was the stranger with the red bag, cane, and old PDA while a pair of blue midgets trailed him.
"What the hell happened?" Elizabeth exclaimed. "Who's that?"
Todd looked at her then down at his assistants.
"Where did she come from?"
"When expecting one and finding between three and five, use 36." Pick repeated. Then she started to point, starting with Beverly. "One, two, three, four." Then she pointed at Elizabeth and said: "Five."
"But what do I do? We're almost out of time."
"Oh migawd is this a home invasion?" Elizabeth squeaked.
"When time is not there for manual application, automatic is authorised." Nit sighed. "Use the stick the other way."
"Are you... Did you..." Elizabeth stammered, trying to make sense of senseless things.
"Um, fine." Todd said, fumbling with his PDA.
"Get out!" Elizabeth ordered. "Get out now or I'm calling the cops."
"Can you pray?" Todd asked.
"Get out! Leave." Elizabeth insisted.
"I'll take that as a no."
Todd fiddled with the cane and pointed it at Elizabeth. A beam of light shot from it, circling Elizabeth's waist. Elizabeth was spun around. Her PJs were jerked down, exposing her floral panties. A rapid series of cracks rang out and Elizabeth screamed in pain.
"Um, her bottom wasn't bare?" Todd half said and half asked.
"Who thought she would have something under PJs." Nick asked.
Elizabeth screamed in pain. She pulled down her panties, exposing a series of 12 equally spaced lines. They started just below the small of her back and the last two were on the tops of her thighs.
"But canes work over clothes." Pit grumbled. "That's why they replaced birches."
"Birches were great." Nick said with a smile. "Why did we stop leaving them?"
"Weren't you listening? Canes replaced them." Pit reminded her.
"But we have to get going." Todd said, moving towards the door.
He opened it, exposing only the empty darkness of space. Then something clicked and reality was back. Todd moved quickly through the door as the television blared to life.
Elizabeth cried, yanked up her PJs, and ran back upstairs. Through tearstreaked eyes she saw the status bar on the email moving. Whatever the maniac had done to her and the others, her paper had been submitted before the deadline. Then she ran back downstairs and asked "What the fuck happened?"
"The Christmas spirit." Beverly said with a smile.
"What?" Elizabeth asked through her tears. "Why is my bum burning? What happened?"
The girls exchanged looks, trying to make sense of what happened. Then the TV was blaring: "Mom? What did I do?" as a series of smacks rang out on the TV show.
"That happened." Candace said, breaking into giggles. "Santa came in and spanked us all."
"No one will every believe this." Kimberly said. "No one will ever believe this. No one."
"I would." Beverly said.
"You and your spirit of Christmas." Rebecca said. "So the punch isn't dosed? Then I'm drinking it. As long as there's vodka there then I'm drinking it."
"That sounds great." Candace agreed. "Set me up with some. I need something to help me believe this is really real."
"Doesn't your red bum prove that it's real?" Kimberly asked.
"I know my bum hurts, but that guy and the blue people with red hair? I'll need something with an edge in it to make me believe this was real." Candace said.
"Let's all get into the Christmas cheer." Beverly agreed cheerfully.
"But what happened?" Elizabeth whined, rubbing her backside.
The five of them got drunk as they tried to work out what happened. What really happened. What they could never report to the authorities. They all agreed no one would ever believe them. When their sixth roommate, Michelle Stamos, returned in early January, she certainly didn't believe it.
"Yeah, sure." Michelle smirked. "A German Christmas legend came to our house and spanked you all."
"All except Beverly." Candace agreed.
"I got the answer right." Beverly said, smiling proudly. "It's the first time I got a test entirely rightly since I got to college."
"Bullshit." Michelle said. "That didn't happen."
"Oh yeah? Elizabeth, show her." Rebecca said. "Come on, you're the only who's still showing."
"I supposed it's nothing that I wouldn't show on the way to the shower." Elizabeth said.
Michelle stared at the fading lines and shrinking welts on Elizabeth's backside.
"Well okay, something happened to her, but a Christmas spirit? I mean, if I had stayed, would something from a kallikantzaros have come in the house and kicked us all?"
"Only if you really believed. Like Beverly does." Elizabeth said bitterly.
"Who doesn't believe in Christmas?" Beverly asked.
"Like you? No one." Candace said.
"Well I don't believe it." Michelle said. "Someone must have spiked the punch with acid or something."
"That does make sense." Rebecca agreed. "More sense than a Christmas spirit. Maybe someone went shopping for X and ended up with bad stuff."
While Michelle was disbelieving Christmas, Todd was recovering from the after party at the Fat Man's workshop. Everyone had been burned out on Christmas Day so the party didn't start until December 28th and lasted until the new year. After that killer blow out, everyone (especially the human temp workers) needed a few days to recover.
Todd was sipping something that he hoped would help settle his stomach when Pick and Nit came by.
"Good news." Pick said, twirling fast enough to raise the skirt of her dress. "The numbers are in! We did great!"
"We did good." Nit acknowledged.
"We did great!" Pick corrected. "You even earned a Christmas bonus."
"Um, I did?" Todd asked, who had been wondering how the job went.
He had only had to find the cane in the bag once. In all the other houses the kids had answered the question right. Sometimes it had been a stretch, a real stretch, but his assistants always nodded when he asked if them if something was good enough.
Of course those college girls hadn't been kids. There had been nothing kid like about any of them... Well, except maybe the childlike belief possessed by the curvaceous girl in the babydolls. A part of his mind was still focused on how he had spanked her. The one before her, the girl who offered sex to escape her strapping, was memorable, but Beverly had enjoyed how he had made her magnificent bottom globes jiggle. And the way all of those women had wiggled over his lap... Todd had never experimented with that and had been startled by how enjoyable it was to take a big girl over your lap and spank her bare bum.
"We used less magic than most." Pick pointed out. "You can thank me for that."
"And we impressed all the kids." Nit said, still twirling. "You can thank me for that."
"He did good." Pick pointed out. "Better most. Huge better than some."
Todd tried to focus on what they were saying and not on the rumoured fate of those who had done terrible jobs. For someone known to be jolly guy, the Fat Man could really crack down people who did a shitty job of keeping the kids amused.
"We collected far more power than we used." Pick said, twirling as she danced around the room.
"We got four adults to believe." Nit grunted. "That's a big thing. Keeping kids believing, that's good. Getting four adults? That's great."
"See!" Pick sang. "Even he says it's great."
"So you qualified for a Christmas bonus." Nit said. "A nice one."
"A really great one." Pick insisted.
"Um, great. What?" Todd asked.
"You get to learn magic." Pick sang.
"Um, what? Magic?" Todd asked.
"They wrote it down." Nit said, reaching into his pocket for some papers. "Um, let's see. A chance to learn a variation of applied quantum theory. A way to do some of the things you did then when you get to the real world."
"Applied quantum theory? Really?" Todd asked, thinking about how Candace hadn't moved until the very end. "What kind of applied quantum theory stuff?"
"Winter feast magic." Pick said, still dancing.
"The sort of stuff we did on the night." Nit said. "Create feasts, travel unseen, move quickly, seeing other versions of reality, and every thing we did then. Do you want to learn it?"
Todd thought about what they had done that night. About all the smiles on the faces of the children. Then he thought about those college girls. How he spanked one of them at a distance of more than 15 feet.
"I'd like to learn that." Todd decided. "I'd like to learn it very much."
That spring, when storms left the arctic and Todd could travel back from the north pole, he travelled in a series of ever increasingly large airplanes. Starting with the four-seater prop he made his way back to civilisation and commercial aircraft. As he did so, Todd carried a magic wand and special viewing crystal.
Resembling a monocle, it could be used to see many things - including viewing nearby quantum realities. In theory there were infinite quantum realities running parallel to this one and in the infinite reaches of reality there places where spankings happened. Todd had tested it, looking at various stewardess and seeing a version of reality where they getting a spanking. During the long series of flights home, Todd watched six different stewardess getting spanked.
All the way, Todd wondered how he would use his new magical powers... Make that how he would use his knowledge of applied quantum theory in his day to day life.
The one thing Todd knew was that he was going to experiment with spanking in his love life. Not that the love life of a theoretical researcher was full of excitement, especially when the researcher was unemployed and living off his savings, but Todd knew that he would make it work. Even if he had to tape his so-called magical powers to make it happen.
Todd wasn't the only one with a magical vision device. Pick and Nit watched Todd as he deplaned in his hometown.
"When do you think he'll learn the downside?" Nit asked.
"Downside? Oh, that he'll have to spend most of his time gathering power before he can use it? Is that what you mean?" Pick asked. "Soon enough."
"Here's hoping he gets laid soon." Nit noted. "I thought he was going explode with those college girls."
"He needs to get some soon." Pick agreed. "All those cute bums while he was on the job. Too bad the Fat Man has a no sex rule. At least not on the job."
"It's been a while since I saw those many nice bums." Nit noted. "Say what you want about the coke sponsorship, but I miss the days when we smacked bum after bum. Why don't we still leave straps, birches, and canes?"
"Those were the days." Pick agreed. "Hey, why don't we find one of those old canes? See how many lines you can paint on my backside?"
"Why not? It will pass the time 'til the next batch gets hired." Nit noted.
Goodgulf